Fort McLeod, June 15th, 1875

My darling Lizzie,

I will go on answering a few thoughts in your letter of May 3rd etseq. before I tell you what has been going on to day. I left off about John coming to Canada – if he does get him acquainted with Frank Darling. I think they would like one another. So you are going to lose Saida. If you went home with her you would not lose her so quickly and so to the heat - & the climate. Athens is as healthy a place as you could find in Canada. During the summer the average temperature I could bet is less than that of Toronto. You know Athens is in a very hilly country near the southernmost spur of the Blue ridge mountains. The nights are nearly always cool and pleasant & people do not go gallivanting about the streets in the full glare of the hot sun. I wonder what subject you will take up to study. Suppose you try mathematics. Your Father would be delighted to help you in so far as Algebra was concerned. The late rains have caused the river to rise very high. The bridge that we took so much trouble to build – is in danger of being washed away, the middle pier has already sunk about a foot – the water comes with fearful force against it. The North Peagan Indians have been over the cut bank across the river all the morning – we expect the Kootanies in every day. I received the pleasant news to day that Baker is going in tomorrow to Benton and will take in a mail – so this goes off tonight. I do not know who wrote ‘Rain in the Heart’. Cissy Stotesbury could perhaps tell you – she sent the piece cut from a newspaper to Aunt Ellen in Savannah. I do not recollect if it had the author’s name attached or not. Of course it is written from that line of Longfellow’s ‘Into each life some rain must fall, Some days must be dark & dreary’.

I certainly had a cold – but I was not afraid of any of my medicines – but I thought that it would get well of itself – which it did and saved me making some of my faces. Your last letter tho’ very dilapidated in appearance was all right on the inside – and none had fallen out. I cannot help drawing a conclusion from your letter. What is to become of me – if when you are happy you tease & when angry scold me? Dear me what a life to lead. Tell Jack that I have received some of the ‘Practictioners’ and also some numbers of the Canadian Monthly. I expect they have come from his thoughtful mind also and am sincerely thankful. The publication of my letters has been quite sufficient to break down a paper-mill – well how weighty they must have been. Indeed poor darling I do feel so sorry for your cold. I am glad you took some ‘hotstuff’ for it – you should have taken it after getting into bed and then piled the blankets over you. I should like to have dropped in upon you during the Spree.

I am glad to learn from the later pages of your letter that your cold succumbed so easily – although it no doubt caused you great annoyance & trouble at the time. So poor Mr. Crawford is dead. I see by the papers that Mr. Brown will not accept the Lt. Gov.ship but it has been conferred upon the Hon. D.A.M. McD. Will he be any more acceptable to you than the Hon. G.B. ? I have been endeavoring to write while an excessively voluble old Half-breed named Munroe about 80 years old with very gray hair and one eye whose lower lid is turned outwards red & glowering – he talks a mixture of French & English and uses all the gesticulations of the Indian. He is talking of the Native medicines. How he does rattle on. Were I not trying to write to you I should be pleased to hear & listen to him. I must close this now. I really can’t get rid of this old chief & cannot possibly write with him taking. I shall however before this goes write a little more.

Well I am glad to say that the old chap has gone. But it is getting very late and I must send this off. Give my love to all at home and with the best love of my heart from your own

Barrie

June 12th (July 12th 1875)

Dear me I never noticed until just now that I have dated this page one month ahead of time. However it does not matter a great deal at present. This morning we are to play our Return match with Subconstables. Our match began at 10 o’clock and we finished our Innings apiece by dinner time. We were ahead by 21 runs, making 42 to their 20. The second Innings they made 50, one man Uniacke [?] scoring 25. We then took the bat and all our wickets went down for 10. Thus we were defeated. I lay the cause of our defeat down to you. Yes, you need not exclaim and cry out “Me”. I mean you El.th Et.Bt. [?]. But possibly an explanation may be owing to you. In our second Innings while we were fielding a cavalcade was seen approaching over the hill. Of course we all became excited and spyglasses were brought into requisition by the spectators and they kept on calling out what they saw and of course we fielded badly and allowed them to make runs. Just as the match was finished Conrad drove up just from Benton and bringing a mail – and as I had a couple of letters from you I therefore lay the blame upon you. Yes letters have come again. I got two from you of the date May 3 and 10th. I also got one from Father dated May 20th telling of Saida’s safe arrival In Savannah. Also one from Aunt Ellen from Athens dated [?]. And one from Loulie from Burlington of May 15th and one from Harry Stotesbury [?] of May 10th. Also one or two papers for which please return my sincere thanks to Jack for the chess. O your dear letters – how I do love to receive them, so trustful, so loving, rambling, mixed up and badly written. But never mind. I won’t take this occasion for criticizing them or anything else. I spent the afternoon reading them and tomorrow will read them over again – and now Good night my darling and God’s blessing be upon you. Good night again.

May 16th

Sunday – Whitsunday – what do you think happened last night? About three o’clock in the morning I was suddenly awakened by Allen’s voice and hearing Crozier speak to me. I was so astonished I hardly knew what to say. They brought some letters and papers, and a dispatch to Col. McLeod which orders him to report immediately to Benton. So he leaves this afternoon.

I got one letter from you and one from Saida. Yours is dated April 22nd and ends on Sunday and Saida’s is dated April 20th and encloses a photograph of hers which I think is very good. Poor girl did I seem abrupt in asking about those lines? I humbly beg pardon. Do you not see how they referred to what you thought you knew? Don’t you see that you are my ‘star’ and you are that ‘something afar’ from the narrow sphere of my lonely sorrow. Of course darling I was wishing for you and somehow those lines kept running in my head. I was puzzled as to the authorship, and wanted to know. And as I write what comes into my head – so I wrote that.

Alas my early rising fit did not last very long. Now and again I do get up early but not as a rule – it is so much more pleasant to lie in bed and think.

Here is a passage in your letter which I cannot understand. You are speaking of Mannie’s advice to [?] not to get anything for the house as he did not want Robertson to have the benefit of it. Then Jack’s meeting Mr. R. and your preparation to be overwhelmed with the honour of Mr. R’s visit – which ends the first sheet. The next sheet is numbered 3 and begins “He said that as far as he was concerned it would not make the slightest difference but he did not like to on the girl’s account”. Did you leave out one sheet? If not I cannot explain it. I have put Jack, Mannie and Mr. R. successively to represent the ‘He’s’. I have made each ‘He’ read ‘Mannie’, ‘Robertson’, ‘Mannie’, and Jack Robertson ‘Jack’ but still cannot explain it.

I am much obliged for the Christina Stories. I have not yet received them. Poor old girl with your headache. I wish I could cure it by mesmerism – from where I am – but would much rather be at hand personally. I hope it was only a touch and that you were free from it in a very short time.

I beg your pardon most humbly for mistaking your meaning. I have found sheet no 2 and now I suppose ‘He’ refers to Roper Crickmore and the ‘Girl’ is Saida. Oh my Eye.

I am going to send this off by Capt. Crozier who is going in to Benton with the Colonel. They will not be very long on the road and this letter will most probably reach you sooner than any other. The answer to your letter will also be the shortest answer you have had. I do not think that any mail has gone out so quickly after the receipt of letters from Home. I have not time to write any more. The Church parade this morning took up so much time and the Col. starts so soon that I must close at once in order to get this into his packet.

And so with much love to all at home

I am as ever

Your own Barrie

April 26th

In a day or two I expect to have another chance of sending in letters. Several of the people round here are going to go in freighting robes – and will take letters. It is blowing up pretty cold, I should not be surprised at a big snow storm. We will have quite a settlement up here next winter. Mr. Power is talking of setting up a store here – in opposition to Conrad, and Mr. Kerler too intends doing the same. Kanonse [?] has bought Foley out and Foley intends building again. We also have a farmer who intends starting a ranch in the immediate vicinity of the Fort and Father Scullen [?] intends building a Church and Parsonage, as well as inducing a large number of halfbreeds to settle down here. So next winter we will have a gay young city. Cpt. Winder too is talking of bringing up his wife and children. Perhaps Col. McLeod will get married and who knows how many more. The more the merrier and also the greater chance for me to make something outside of my salary.

I suppose that Saida has left you ere this. Has she gone directly home? Or does she intend staying a while longer in the North? I wish that you could go home with her. Do try.

I want you to ask Mannie to find out for me the Properties Botanical & Physiological & Therapeutical indications of Oxo Crocia and Dragon’s Blood.

For the present I must say good night. I open the ball again to tell you to direct my letters to :

Fort McLeod, via Ft. Shaw, Montana Territory.

I find that by sending them to I.G.B. & Co. [I.G. Baker & Co.] they are delayed sometimes a week. Col. McLeod told me the direction I have just given you is the better one. All mail matter for us is at Windsor consigned in bags for Ft. McLeod – which I believe do not break bulk until they reach Fort Shaw and are then sent on to us. Whereas if they are directed to Baker – they go first to Ft. Shaw, thence to Benton and then back again to Shaw.

I also want you to send me or have Jack send me the “Daily Mail” in place of the weekly. Will you ask him? This mail starts out tomorrow morning early. So I will have to send you away with a very short letter. Give my love to all and to Saida if she still be there. Good night again.

With much love believe me

Yours forever

Barrie.

February (Oh my) March 13th 1875. Fort Macleod

My darling Lizzie

Yesterday Col. Macleod left, taking Denny + a servant, on their trip to Helena. It was snowing hard when they left and continued to do so all day, a bad lookout for such a journey as they have undertaken. We gave the Col. 3 cheers as he left the gateway of the Fort + the [?] [?] started off in fine style. As everyone who had been away for any time from our Fort always [?] them-selves as mighty pleased to get back again, none of us envied them greatly, although we should [?] a trip to the outskirts of civilization. Nothing in particular happened after they lef, so good night.

My thoughts were [?]on yesterday. I thought today was the 12th, so I will say good night just now. This morning I got up quite early, 8 o'clock, and felt fresh. Sick call sounded at 9, and I went over to the Hospital[.] the snow was 6 or 8 inches deep, it was still cloudy but the sun was endeavouring to pierce through the thick veil. I found quite a large number on the sick list, but I soon polished them off. I then had my breakfast. Venison cutlets, sauce au[?] Police Mountie, Hot coffee, Hotrolls, butter + then [?] + molasses, + then a pipe. The I went into my room and began arranging it, + having [?] everything to my satisfaction, sat down to read. I read the [?], no, The Country Neighbourhood, until lunchtime. I like the story, and yet I do not. It seems natural [?] overdrawn, perhaps I will like it better as I go on.

After lunch, I went to work and made a small easel to paint upon, and then went down and had a chat with Conrad. Then coming back went on reading. Soon I noticed a stir goin on outside and found an expidition going outor rather preparing to dress, more deserters, three men this time. Allen + Jackson have the command + will I expect catch them. At dinner our numbers were reduced to four[,] after dinner Crozier and I played cribbage against Winder + Welch + beat them, then we tried [?] + beat them at that too, then I read a few moments but was soon called away to see a sick man. He kept me busy awhile + now I come to have a talk with you. It is now 10 o'clock, you are most likely in bed and asleep. I always like to talk with you at this time, because it seems as tho' you are so much nearer than at any other time. No one is bothering you and perhaps you are dreaming of me now. And I almost feel your spirit's presence hovering near me. I have a letter of yours dated Feb. 4th, open in front of me, + I shall proceed to answer it. I am curious (just think of it) to know what there can be to make you proud of Saida, I always have been. Thank you again and again for your dear photograph[,] I am so pleased to get it. True the rose looks very sharp + the cuffs large, but I cannot afford to criticise it even for fun. So I take that little bit of chaff all back + [?] [?] any more. Do I remember the [?] (that is meant for an 'S') a z(this is not)[?] three years ago? Yes I recollect it perfectly and [?] I [?] to be so tried, in order that I might see you look sorry and make you sit close and talk to me. I did not feel hurt[?] at your answer. I expected nothing else there, but I found out what I wanted, old girl, even if it was dark. And now let me tell you good night.

Feb. 2nd

Crozier got away this afternoon about 1.30 he expects to be away about two or three weeks. The square was a scene of busy confusion all morning, men choosing horses, + then endeavouring to catch them, saddling + getting their provisions etc on a small toboggan. The day is pretty cold but will probably not remain so for long as a South West Wind is blowing. The mail which was redistributed to the men has revived again + tomorrow another trial is to be made to get it off. Let us hope this time with more success. Allen is now singing as loud as he can bawl, not 3 feet from my left ear + making the nights hideous with harsh discords, without exception he has a harsh whistle + unmusical a voice as any one I have ever heard. The great beauty of it is that he imagines it is superb + that he has a fine tenor voice. However he has his good points and is going to take the mail tomorrow morning over to Stand Off where it is to be taken to Benton by some teams going in from thence. So we will say no more about his singing – perhaps he is only happy that his letters are going in, and I am sure we can overlook any little boisterous outburst. That blot is owing to my writing with a new pen. “J”, Is that not Sallie’s favourite pen? I + it at first did not hold the ink consequently it *ran* down on the paper + I put the blotting paper over it which I think did not mend matters much. Just think it is only a month since I heard from you last, and I have been groaning + whining because I have not heard sooner, and for nearly six months I heard not a word. I suppose the difference is to be accounted for in the fact that I have now more time to think over the matter, + perhaps like the tiger after once tasting blood is athirst for more. At all events I am anxious awaiting the arrival of another mail + letters from you.

I am sorry to say my tooth began aching again to day, but only for a short time. Poor Denny has been suffering from a bad toothache, which I have managed to relieve but he refuses to have his tooth extracted it is a front tooth + perhaps his looks would be considerably damaged. I am very much afraid that I will not be able to go to Canada on any leave of absence, as every day I find something more for me to do or something that will act to keep me here continually. But as none of us know what disposition will be made of the Force next Summer, so none of us know where we will be or what we will be doing. It may be that we may all go to Fort Garry or Pelly. But in any case I think I am booked for Fort Macleod until I leave the Police. Do you recollect what Jack + Mannie were going to do? Come out next summer + take dinner! What a blessing the sight of a well known face associated with Canada would be, not only to myself but to every member of the Force. What is Mannie doing now. Has he started a practice in town, or has he gotten a practiceship anywhere? You will perhaps be glad to know that Brooks my patient about whom I was so anxious is now much better. Next Sunday, if all goes as well as it has, I expect him to set off. I am going to cross this letter although I have not yet heard from you whether you like them crossed but I have not a great deal of time to write much more and expect to finish this very soon. I wonder what you have been doing with yourself this past month I wonder if you have gone home with Saida[?]. I suppose not. There is only one way ever to get you then and that is to take you there myself and so Mother will never know Lizzie Beaty but by hearsay. Do you think that it is possible for this to reach you on Valentine’s day. Possible but not probable. 4 days to Benton + 11 to Toronto. The 17th. However near enough to be a Valentine.

The days are now rapidly lengthening and the Sun is daily becoming more and more powerful, so that the middle of the day is now quite comfortable. It won’t be long before they are warm. How pleasant that will be. And when they do get warm, I shall often take our Sunday evening walk, which the excessive cold caused as to discontinue. I used to so enjoy them. I was then by myself and yet not alone, everything I saw spoke of you, and all sounds shaped themselves into words spoken from you, and I always came back with a sense of comfort and rest from those after tea walks.

Do you remember or rather will you ever forget the pleasant times we used to have on Sunday evenings. Oh, dear. And now the Mail is about closing and I must hurry to say God bless you. Remember me to all, + also to Auntie Taylor is you visit her or see her.

Times up. Believe me Lizzie as ever

Your own Barrie

Dec. 28th Monday.

Last night it grew steadily colder until the thermometer sank to 24º below zero. It was a pretty cold morning. The sun however rose bright & clear. I got up about half past eight and at nine went over to the Hospital. I had quite a number sick today – most of them trying to get off work on account of the cold. After I had polished them off a man came in with a toothache and wanted me to draw his tooth. I told him to come back in a half hour – as I wanted to get breakfast first. His tooth was not paining him then so he could wait with a pleasant anticipation.

Dear Liz, how glad you make me feel when you tell me that you have not been altogether unhappy with me. I am so thankful that my little girl is not too lonely all by herself – and if she thinks of me – she knows that. My darling – you speak of a womans definition of Loving. Do, Act, Love as your own true heart dictates and I will be satisfied – so thoroughly that no doubt or shadow of a doubt shall ever enter my mind. Mrs. Brownings map of Loving is extremely fine – but when did you begin to read her poetry? She is a fine writer and has some very deep glimpses into Human feeling. I am glad for Annie Taylors sake if your modified opinion of Mr. R. is the proper one. His Father was a fine man – and no one appears to know of anything tangible against Mr. R. Poor Liz – how any one can twist you round their finger and make a friend of you by saying a good word of me. I received your beautiful blue feather. I am glad you enjoyed your moonlight drive. I think the difference in time is about 3 or 4 hours. It takes 15º Longitude to the hour we are about 176º - and I do not know exactly the meridian of Toronto – but I think there is about 4 hours difference. But for the present I must say goodbye. I will be back again to talk with you in a few minutes. I pulled the man’s tooth for which he was deeply grateful and have now come back to you.

I am afraid that the report about the increase of salary is without foundation – at all events I have officially heard nothing about it and with regard to the disbandment of the Force – the appointments of new officers – hardly looks astho’ they were going to break it up again. So you don’t want me back again eh? Never mind I don’t believe you – and I will come back as soon as possible. Your beautiful pouch is very acceptable to me. Poor Liz. I am afraid that you are very lonely sometimes in spite of the cheery tone of your letters. I know I am. Your poor rose bud which you picked on Sunday Nov. 1 & were so careful in pressing was all broken up by the transit. I will keep the leaves however because your dear hands picked it. Dr. Gunn got hold of a very nice & extremely pretty little English girl in Janie Jones. She will prove very useful to him – she is handy & quiet. I always pictured our future home with a servant like Janie – noiseless & effective. Poor old woman to go busying your little head with such grand plans for me. Dr. Jukes would I am afraid not like to take your word for my efficiency and no one can tell whether we would get along together. I must confess that the plan would be very pleasant. But you must not look so high for me. remember Dr. York’s cottage or hovel – in Orangeville. That is the sort of place to be in. You remember too what you said when I showed you the house. In regard to my promotions all I have to say is with You & Saida – “only hope it is so” Poor Saida and her grand secret – what an insane idea. Out here in the Far West we are not so careful of our hair as Miss Taylor was. I laughed a good deal over her sitting up so stiffly on her chair. I am sorry that you were disappointed in the rejection of Dr. Jukes – especially as it knocks all our 'Chateau En Espange’ endways. Thank you very kindly for the relations you have discovered for me I do not know however that I particularly care for a lot of new relatives. Perhaps however they may come in useful some of these days and we will then lay claim to them – as to their wills if they ever make any. I would not count much upon them. The messenger who was to have started to Benton today has put off his departure until tomorrow – so I will have time to finish this letter to you. I have not been able to get a sketch of the square for you yet – but will send some Indians that I have managed to get hold on in various places and have stuck them into one piece of paper. On the back of the paper was a scene of our tent life. Jackson’s bed had a coat spread over part of it and my bed can just be seen in the corner behind the stove – which the foot of it is occupied by my leather satchel which can be partly seen at the end of the stove. I expect the lead will be pretty well rubbed by the time you got them. And now I must say goodbye for a little while I must go get some lunch. After lunch I had to make up a liniment for a man at Fort Kipp 14 miles from here – he has a sore leg. Then I had to go and see Brooks, it was a pretty cold tramp down there & my face was pretty white when I arrived at the house. Brooks is about the same. I am going to try and get him moved up into the Hospital tomorrow. I hope it will not be too cold for him. On New Year’s days we are going to have a lot of games races etc. Open to the world I should not be surprised but what we should have a very gay time. A foot ball match opens the proceedings & a squaw Race and an Indian Pony race are the chief points of interest in the afternoon. I am trying to write and there are three young fellows making fun of one another & laughing so I am very liable to make mistakes - & to get mixed. You must not expect to have a very very long letter this time – as so many interruptions have occurred that it has been almost impossible to keep my mind down to the subject – and now I must again say Good bye. Perhaps after dinner I will be able to add a few cross lines to this. Can you read these crossed letters? If you cannot, tell me and I will be careful in future not to cross them. I only do it because it saves the bulky appearance of the letter. So good bye. I have only time to end this off now & with love to all I am

Your own
Barrie