Mar. 17th

The 17th of "Ould Ireland." Long may she wave. I got up this morning, and it was pretty cold, in fact we might say very cold. I suppose it thawed in Toronto[,] it usually does. I intend going put + trying a shot at the sun. Do not think darling from that expression that I have taken leave of my senses, I merely intend to say that I am going to try and take the sun's altitude to find the time. I must now go to breakfast. You will see by this that I did not get up very early.

I could not after all let the night pass without saying at least good night. The day passed very quietly, everyone wearing in their hat or button hole a sprig of green, plucked from the logs wherewith our houses are built, which have sprouted and thrown out innumerable little green branches. Good night.

Mar. 16th

This morning I went [?] my usual rounds and the sat down to read "Lorna"[.] I have nearly finished it and like it very much. I am going to begin a new era of my existence by getting up early in the mornings. This is not the first time in my life that I have made similar resolves, but I never had the the[sic] same inducements. I intend to write to you in the mornings[,] so if my letters begin to get more dull + stupid, you can account for it by my being half awake. So good night to you now.

March 15th Monday

It has been very cold all day the wind still coming from the North, towards evening it shifted towards the South East. The thermometer is now 12° below zero. The sentry's voice rings out clear & sharp ["]all's well["]. I have literally done nothing today, except attend to my regular duties and put a bottom to a box of which I am endeavouring to make a desk to keep my papers and letters in. I have finished "The Country Neighbourhood"[.] I like it but it seems unsatisfactory. I do not think it has the genuine[?] [?] about it. I had loaned all the books you sent me, so I borrowed "Lorna Doone" + read a portion of that. But now I must put down in my notebook the outlines of a case of hemorrhage I have on hand. So good night.

March 14. Monday.

The party leaving yesterday have not yet come back. The same way [']round, only I had your darling letters to read in the intervals. 9p.m. Jackson got back about four o'clock + reported that he had discovered no traces of the deserters, but had received a note from Allen to say that he was on their track. Allen came in about 6 bringing the 3 crestfallen men along. He had caught up with them about 24 miles up the river. One of them who had no pass showed fright, but was persuaded to come along quietly[,] the other two had passes granting[?] them leave to be absent for 8 days hunting. He had other evidence against themhowever + they were put into the guard room. The day was pretty cold + there is no doubt but what their apprehension + recapture was the very best thing that could have happened to them. Yours of the 25th Jan. is in front of me. I do not think that I would cry if the Force was disbanded at once, but I do not think it will be. It is indeed a very nice thing for Bob Gill[?] and I wish him well. If Jack wants to get rid of his indigestion the best thing he can do is to come out here and pay me a visit. Dear Lizzie, what horrible dreams you have[.] I do not know which part of your dream is the more hateful. In the first I could still look after you, be with you always, know all your thoughts, but in the second I shoul dhave to brave your scorn[,] your forgiveness[,] your coldness and perhaps your hate. But my own darling[,] you are deserting your old habit. Don't you know, have you not often told me, that dreams go by contraries? Poor dear Lizzie. I will take good of myself[?].

I have not read 'Bleak Houses", nor 'Lucia di Lammer-moor' [Lucia di Lammermoor](which I think is the name of the Opera) but anything in the shape of reading [?] will be most acceptable, and neither Dickens nor Scott can be read too frequently[?]. You silly creature to [?] so about my watch. Lizzie child, [d]on't you know how much, how entirely, I trust you? If anything ever should cast a shadow over our bright love, Darling, I shall point[?] the shadow to you and together we can drive it away, long before it gathers any substance. But I think we can prevent even the shadow, can we not? How did Mannie provoke you? By throwing his gloves at you, by asking about the leters in the mail? Poor girl. The time is not so very far distant but what I will be at hand to soothe + comfort you as much as I can dearest. Yes indeed, I do know a great deal better. So [?] people talk. I know you and I do not care for the, and would not give a snap of my finger for them and all their talk together. But, for present good night.

February (Oh my) March 13th 1875. Fort Macleod

My darling Lizzie

Yesterday Col. Macleod left, taking Denny + a servant, on their trip to Helena. It was snowing hard when they left and continued to do so all day, a bad lookout for such a journey as they have undertaken. We gave the Col. 3 cheers as he left the gateway of the Fort + the [?] [?] started off in fine style. As everyone who had been away for any time from our Fort always [?] them-selves as mighty pleased to get back again, none of us envied them greatly, although we should [?] a trip to the outskirts of civilization. Nothing in particular happened after they lef, so good night.

My thoughts were [?]on yesterday. I thought today was the 12th, so I will say good night just now. This morning I got up quite early, 8 o'clock, and felt fresh. Sick call sounded at 9, and I went over to the Hospital[.] the snow was 6 or 8 inches deep, it was still cloudy but the sun was endeavouring to pierce through the thick veil. I found quite a large number on the sick list, but I soon polished them off. I then had my breakfast. Venison cutlets, sauce au[?] Police Mountie, Hot coffee, Hotrolls, butter + then [?] + molasses, + then a pipe. The I went into my room and began arranging it, + having [?] everything to my satisfaction, sat down to read. I read the [?], no, The Country Neighbourhood, until lunchtime. I like the story, and yet I do not. It seems natural [?] overdrawn, perhaps I will like it better as I go on.

After lunch, I went to work and made a small easel to paint upon, and then went down and had a chat with Conrad. Then coming back went on reading. Soon I noticed a stir goin on outside and found an expidition going outor rather preparing to dress, more deserters, three men this time. Allen + Jackson have the command + will I expect catch them. At dinner our numbers were reduced to four[,] after dinner Crozier and I played cribbage against Winder + Welch + beat them, then we tried [?] + beat them at that too, then I read a few moments but was soon called away to see a sick man. He kept me busy awhile + now I come to have a talk with you. It is now 10 o'clock, you are most likely in bed and asleep. I always like to talk with you at this time, because it seems as tho' you are so much nearer than at any other time. No one is bothering you and perhaps you are dreaming of me now. And I almost feel your spirit's presence hovering near me. I have a letter of yours dated Feb. 4th, open in front of me, + I shall proceed to answer it. I am curious (just think of it) to know what there can be to make you proud of Saida, I always have been. Thank you again and again for your dear photograph[,] I am so pleased to get it. True the rose looks very sharp + the cuffs large, but I cannot afford to criticise it even for fun. So I take that little bit of chaff all back + [?] [?] any more. Do I remember the [?] (that is meant for an 'S') a z(this is not)[?] three years ago? Yes I recollect it perfectly and [?] I [?] to be so tried, in order that I might see you look sorry and make you sit close and talk to me. I did not feel hurt[?] at your answer. I expected nothing else there, but I found out what I wanted, old girl, even if it was dark. And now let me tell you good night.

March 11th

Conrad's horses came in yesterday, late in the afternoon and brought me one paper, The Nation. Of course I was proportionately disappointed for I fully expected to hear again from you. Col. MacLeod has determined [?] go in tomorrow to [?] on business. The business I think is to [?] out a [?] for furnishing [?] the Cypress Hills[.] a large quantity of flour and oats, to be determined next [?] [?], which looks as though somebody was going to their next [?]. I wrote yesterday to Harry Stotesburg & to [?], and also added some lines to a letter to my brother, so I was pretty well occupied, don't you think so? And now I must endeavour to answer you with [?] affection [?] which was the day Baker left here with the [?]

second made a mistake your letter was [?] the 1st of Feb. or the fifth? I am very glad that you had[?] the [?] [?] [?] of no discourse of mine[,] I shall be able to do better than that at least[.] Frank says it is in my own hand I have to be economical with my drawing people as I have only a very little. I suppose that you would not object to my getting into mischef with you as [?] [?] to dislike the idea without you. I really cannot tell you how many pipes I smoke every day. I [?] [?] and calcuate. If a pound of tobacco contains 16 ounces and each ounce 8 drachmas[?], + each smoke contains one drachma and a pound of tobacco lasts me one week[.] Then there will be 128 smokes through the week or about 18 pipes a day. Now[,] if I sleep 8 hours of the twentyfour and[?] am[?] [?] with work which prohibits smoking for four[?] more[?] [?] you will see [?] [?] [?] [?] [?] hours[?] left in [?] those 8 pipes, must come very nearly two pipes an hour. However I may observe here that a pound of tobacco lasts me considerably over a month, which will [?] the average down to a much lower figure. I seldom will smoke before breakfast + do not get breakfast at times until 10 o'clock so don't be frightened. Yes I am a very useful man. I will gaurentee to work at anything for you when you have found out what you want. I forgive[?] Frank, tell him so and heap coals of fire on his head. My watch is now going all night[,] keeps pretty good time[.] I keep it going by the sun [?] it back of [?] fast + on if too low that I had anything to be [?] about? + who the should [?] the blame? I [?] back in defiance You, you, you. Oh I meant to tell you that I have [?] my [?] of Surgeon dated July 6th, but have heard nothing of my increase of pay. You have [?] me you can read my crossed letters. You will now have an opportunity of doing so. It is blowing and storming to day at a great rate[,] one is not able to see more than a hundred yards. Col. Macleod goes in to [?] soon. [P]erhaps not tomorrow on account of the storm. I will add a line or two to this if he [?] [?] [?] than tomorrow. So for the present I will say goodbye. With love, I am your Barrie.

No time to add more. Many many thanks for your kind present and your photo. It goes 'round with me now everywhere. The [?] have informed “Col. MacLeod that [?] arrangements have been made for the provision[?] of the Force.

Your own, Barrie.

Fort Macloed March 10 1875

My Dear Lizzie,

Last Monday, i.e. March 8th I footed(?) a letter to you. It has not [?] gotten outside [?] [?] of the Fort. About 10 o'clock the same morning a band of horses were seen coming over the hill. [?] were daily [?] horses from Sun River. Baker [?] horses for [?] and with [?]. Mail was expected every day. Who was it? Indians? A huge[?] crowd soon collected in front of the fort. Glasses of [?] form were all leveled in the direction of the coming strangers. Conjecture was rife. Betting was high. The horses rapidly approaching, some of our men at work on a bridge about [?] quarter of a mile from the fort. [?] their work and ran promiscuously[?] towards the new comers. [?] hearts [?] high. Some [?] [?] Maj. Walsh. [?] decieved if our suspense culminated in the heart [?] fact that the horses were for us from Sun River. Was there any mail? The horses came nearer, nearer, within a speaking distance. [?] Cochrane in charge. The question shouted ouy to him Have you any Mail? The answer came back, no. Another disappointment to add to our long list of previous ones. However he told us that he had left our mail at Fort Kipp, which was coming along in a wagon. [? shouts of joy and exaltating. How many anxious eyes kept close watch upon the distant prairie horizon. How many wary hearts ached to hear from the loved ones at home, and now [?] high with hope. Finally the wagon came in sight. The crowd which had been distracted by the horses in a moment rushed [?] of the [?] anxious joyful turbulent. In half an hour the mail had come. 11.48am. Mar 8th 1875. A day to be marked [?] a [?] stoned in my calendar. I managed to get [?] to [?] room when the letters were being distributed and got my [?]. There were 3 large bags full, over 300lbs of mail [?]. I got letters from you. Those that were set to Dufferin + Garry and the [?] that was one began on the 8th of February just one month before I recieved it. [?] received a quantity of papers, mails, notorious[?] practitioners[?], [?], as wll as some [?] papers. How am I ever to be sufficiently thoughtful to your kind thoughtful [?] + Jack willingly taken trouble for me. I immediately sat down and found the last letter you wrote, found you were well + then read your letters in reverse order as regards dates then found some letters from home I sat there [?] afternoon reading your letters, and the evening found me still busy. I could not finish all that night. On Tuesday morning I began again and by lunch time had [?] I had 48 letters! I have managed to glance at the papers but have not looked into them [?]. [?] found in [?] [?] the [?] folks and today I am writing to you. I hardly know what is in your letters do not know if you have asked me many questions or not I am so taken up with the [?] idea of your doing well and that for the time being was all I cared for. I shall take your letters of one each day and [?] and answer your questions. There is another [?] [?] of letters Conrad expects teams out from Benton + [?] there will also come other + later letters. [?] never [?] but [?] [?]. I am happy [?]. I can look [???]. Besides the mail there is little or nothing to talk about. Brooks is far better and stronger than he has been [?]. He too received a letter from home and has written one in answer. His grandmother has been very ill but is now or when she wrote quite well. I have learned [?] [?] [?] + had the [?] [?] with it. I shall proceed to answer your letter of the 8th [?]. Your letters friends to me? friends, no, not friends but something [?] closer than any friend, they are part of myself or they are reflections of your own pure warm heart and are dearer than any friend. I have not been taking my Sunday evening walk very regularly and my mind goes back to the 8th of february with [?] - I do not think i did- on Tuesday morning I was quite well thank you but [?] if it was not 11 when you were writing it could not have been quite [?] and most probably I was just getting up. The sick call is at nine and I have to bein the Hospital then. What [?] were you [?], it was evidently in the opera house, but on what occasion, [?] you have [?] [?] in one of our friends letters, and I did not notice it. I am glad you enjoyed it so Mrs. [?] was [?]. Poor thing! I hope she managed to get warm before the evening was over. My dear child I am exceedingly sorry that the thought of me should interfere in any way with your [?]. [?] not for [?] [?] [?] that I ever doubt any thing you do. [?] a fall and not [?] because you think I would find cause for doubt! Child you should not do that. [?] [?] [?] you dance and enjoy yourself as much as possible. Don't you be so [?] again. I would never forgive myself if I thought I prevented your dancing.

Capt. [?] received his discharge from the force. [?] is also [?] reported here/the report comes from Winnipeg that he's now Lord [?] and has an enourmous fortune. I hope for his wife's sake it [?] [?] [?]. I have not received the paper with the sketch of the ball. Perhaps it may be coming along in Conrad's [?]. From all the talk of fish I suppose you must have founded an aquarium in your conservatory, but how you manage to get catfish into it I do not understand. I am sorry to hear that Bessie(?) Cameron is sick. I hope [?] then that she was quite [?]. Poor Mannie, I sincerely hope that the abcess in his head will proove nothing serious. I really cannot[?] see the [?]in his [?] Dr.Cameron on the [?] [?], if he had it slang[?] [?] his [?] or [?] in his back or even fancied on his hat, one might say there was some concern, but where else would you have him put it? I am [?] of your way of thinking about Miss [?] Taylor, but I do not know for what reason. I am quite prepared to think [?] + everything [?] bad of Mr.[?] but if any one asked me why, I should feel exceedingly puzzled to give a satisfactory answer. I think [?] I have answered [?] [?], no question has been before unanswered, and for the present I must leave you. The mail closes tonight and I have one or two official letters to send and wish to write to Harry [?] [?] and another letter home. Give my love to all at home. Tell Jack I will write to him by the next opportunity. I find that I am greatly in his debt. Wish ever so much love.

I am your own Barrie.