Fort Macloed March 10 1875

My Dear Lizzie,

Last Monday, i.e. March 8th I footed(?) a letter to you. It has not [?] gotten outside [?] [?] of the Fort. About 10 o'clock the same morning a band of horses were seen coming over the hill. [?] were daily [?] horses from Sun River. Baker [?] horses for [?] and with [?]. Mail was expected every day. Who was it? Indians? A huge[?] crowd soon collected in front of the fort. Glasses of [?] form were all leveled in the direction of the coming strangers. Conjecture was rife. Betting was high. The horses rapidly approaching, some of our men at work on a bridge about [?] quarter of a mile from the fort. [?] their work and ran promiscuously[?] towards the new comers. [?] hearts [?] high. Some [?] [?] Maj. Walsh. [?] decieved if our suspense culminated in the heart [?] fact that the horses were for us from Sun River. Was there any mail? The horses came nearer, nearer, within a speaking distance. [?] Cochrane in charge. The question shouted ouy to him Have you any Mail? The answer came back, no. Another disappointment to add to our long list of previous ones. However he told us that he had left our mail at Fort Kipp, which was coming along in a wagon. [? shouts of joy and exaltating. How many anxious eyes kept close watch upon the distant prairie horizon. How many wary hearts ached to hear from the loved ones at home, and now [?] high with hope. Finally the wagon came in sight. The crowd which had been distracted by the horses in a moment rushed [?] of the [?] anxious joyful turbulent. In half an hour the mail had come. 11.48am. Mar 8th 1875. A day to be marked [?] a [?] stoned in my calendar. I managed to get [?] to [?] room when the letters were being distributed and got my [?]. There were 3 large bags full, over 300lbs of mail [?]. I got letters from you. Those that were set to Dufferin + Garry and the [?] that was one began on the 8th of February just one month before I recieved it. [?] received a quantity of papers, mails, notorious[?] practitioners[?], [?], as wll as some [?] papers. How am I ever to be sufficiently thoughtful to your kind thoughtful [?] + Jack willingly taken trouble for me. I immediately sat down and found the last letter you wrote, found you were well + then read your letters in reverse order as regards dates then found some letters from home I sat there [?] afternoon reading your letters, and the evening found me still busy. I could not finish all that night. On Tuesday morning I began again and by lunch time had [?] I had 48 letters! I have managed to glance at the papers but have not looked into them [?]. [?] found in [?] [?] the [?] folks and today I am writing to you. I hardly know what is in your letters do not know if you have asked me many questions or not I am so taken up with the [?] idea of your doing well and that for the time being was all I cared for. I shall take your letters of one each day and [?] and answer your questions. There is another [?] [?] of letters Conrad expects teams out from Benton + [?] there will also come other + later letters. [?] never [?] but [?] [?]. I am happy [?]. I can look [???]. Besides the mail there is little or nothing to talk about. Brooks is far better and stronger than he has been [?]. He too received a letter from home and has written one in answer. His grandmother has been very ill but is now or when she wrote quite well. I have learned [?] [?] [?] + had the [?] [?] with it. I shall proceed to answer your letter of the 8th [?]. Your letters friends to me? friends, no, not friends but something [?] closer than any friend, they are part of myself or they are reflections of your own pure warm heart and are dearer than any friend. I have not been taking my Sunday evening walk very regularly and my mind goes back to the 8th of february with [?] - I do not think i did- on Tuesday morning I was quite well thank you but [?] if it was not 11 when you were writing it could not have been quite [?] and most probably I was just getting up. The sick call is at nine and I have to bein the Hospital then. What [?] were you [?], it was evidently in the opera house, but on what occasion, [?] you have [?] [?] in one of our friends letters, and I did not notice it. I am glad you enjoyed it so Mrs. [?] was [?]. Poor thing! I hope she managed to get warm before the evening was over. My dear child I am exceedingly sorry that the thought of me should interfere in any way with your [?]. [?] not for [?] [?] [?] that I ever doubt any thing you do. [?] a fall and not [?] because you think I would find cause for doubt! Child you should not do that. [?] [?] [?] you dance and enjoy yourself as much as possible. Don't you be so [?] again. I would never forgive myself if I thought I prevented your dancing.

Capt. [?] received his discharge from the force. [?] is also [?] reported here/the report comes from Winnipeg that he's now Lord [?] and has an enourmous fortune. I hope for his wife's sake it [?] [?] [?]. I have not received the paper with the sketch of the ball. Perhaps it may be coming along in Conrad's [?]. From all the talk of fish I suppose you must have founded an aquarium in your conservatory, but how you manage to get catfish into it I do not understand. I am sorry to hear that Bessie(?) Cameron is sick. I hope [?] then that she was quite [?]. Poor Mannie, I sincerely hope that the abcess in his head will proove nothing serious. I really cannot[?] see the [?]in his [?] Dr.Cameron on the [?] [?], if he had it slang[?] [?] his [?] or [?] in his back or even fancied on his hat, one might say there was some concern, but where else would you have him put it? I am [?] of your way of thinking about Miss [?] Taylor, but I do not know for what reason. I am quite prepared to think [?] + everything [?] bad of Mr.[?] but if any one asked me why, I should feel exceedingly puzzled to give a satisfactory answer. I think [?] I have answered [?] [?], no question has been before unanswered, and for the present I must leave you. The mail closes tonight and I have one or two official letters to send and wish to write to Harry [?] [?] and another letter home. Give my love to all at home. Tell Jack I will write to him by the next opportunity. I find that I am greatly in his debt. Wish ever so much love.

I am your own Barrie.

Mar. 8th

It is a lovely morning. The sun shines bright and warm + the wind blows fresh from the mountains. I have gotten up early this morning to finish this letter to you. The Mail closes to day at 9 o’clock Glen expects to be in Benton in ten days, he goes by the upper road so [?] to [?][?] every night. The fresh [?] this morning was the advert[?] of half a dozen Indians with [?][?]. One a woman with a terrible hand her constitution[?] all broken[?] down, and suffering dreadfully. I washed the hand + examined it but am still in doubt. I may yet have to amputate it, the others were [?] ailments and easily dealt with. So you see I am becoming a successful practitioner amongst the [?] savages. And I think too they all like me for I am gentle + thoughtful of their feelings[?] just as tho’ they were white civilized people. And they, I think, appreciate kindness as much as any one. When I go to their[?] [?] today[?] they gave me a smoke always and talk and laugh away in the happiness [?]. And any[?] little thing[?] they want[?] done they come to me to get it[?] done for these. I have the same old story. No Mail. No one knows what is the reason[?] but [?][?] conjectures are afloat which becomes more and more varied[?] as each day passes without [?] its arrival. I must now say Good bye Give my love to all at home. Remember me kindly to Mr. Allison[?] + [?]. Tell Mannie I wrote to him by the last Mail but one. When[?] does your birthday come, some day this month. I wish you many many happy returns of[?] it[?]. [?]. With much love, I am

Your own

Barrie

Dec. 22nd.

The last few lines of the last crossed page were written this morning. I got up in the usual time & had a cup of tea went over to the Hospital polished off the sick & came back to have another cup of tea & a smoke, and to talk with Lizzie. I have your letter just at hand and am reading it over and – how would you like a sharp criticism upon it? But don’t get alarmed, I am too glad to get your dear letters. My criticisms will be reserved for yourself, - when I gather from the tenor of your letter that you are overlooking yourself or not taking sufficient care of yourself. On your way to St. Catherines you must have formed a pleasant party. I know Mr. William Mulock very well. I boarded with him at Mrs. Whitney’s for some time, & altho’ he is a University man and an avant Grit & a lawyer – I like him. It must have been quite a meeting at the Hamilton Junction. Mannie also told me of it in his letter. I am glad to hear that Harry Carling is better. My darling tell me truly now are you not well? I do not like to hear of your needing a tonic but if you do of course it is better that you should take it. I hope the need has long ere this passed away.

Fort MacLeod, December 16th 1874

My Dear Liz

This is a day that must ever be marked with a white store – for today we, I speak collectively for the force, received a portion of mail matter. I got a letter from Jack dated Oct. 11 Yours of Oct. 5th, 9th, 12th, 19th, 26th – one from Mannie of the same month – some from Aunt Ellie & Mannie of Oct. 16th also some copies of the Mail – for which I am deeply thankful. You will receive at the same time as this a letter from me – complaining very much of the letters not coming. I had almost begun to fancy something was wrong – but the fact that no one received letters made me feel that the wrong lay in the transportation. Thank God my darling that you are well. How many many times the dragging thought has haunted me that you might be ill and I not at hand to help you take care of you. All day long I have been so busy getting a list of drugs & medicines required that had to go by Major Walsh who left at 12 to day - & he had not been gone an hour when the letters came I spent the afternoon reading your letters but can hardly answer any questions. I was only cognizant of the fact that I was reading your own dear letter and I knew you to be well. I have not read any of the other letters but Jack’s. I find I have an opportunity of sending this letter after Major Walsh & can only hurriedly say that I have received yours. I am well that is all I can say. Well – everything has an end and so have long periods of time – perhaps I will one day receive your other letters – which are now wandering somewhere between Toronto & Fort MacLeod and the North Pole & the Equator.

I will just look over your last letter again. So you are in St. Kitt? Remember me most kindly to Miss Taylor and so my promotion & increase of salary is good news is it? Don’t you think that the natural consequences of that will be to lengthen my stay here? Perhaps you ought to look at it in this light viz that I am here for the purpose of making a sum of money that the larger my salary is the more rapidly will that sum be accumulated and consequently the sooner will I return. I must say that I can hardly give credence to the report. How did Dr. Thorburn know anything about it? However if you mean what you say – Old Woman, beware! I may stay out here for a longer time than at present I expect to. But if you do not want me there will be no object in my going back too soon. Your letter did not reach me in time for my Birthday nor late enough for Christmas. I hope that you will get this about New Year’s day. Thank you ever so kindly for your beautiful Tobacco pouch. It is quite acceptable I hope sincerely that I will superintend the making of the next one – perhaps too I will ‘catch’ you at it. I was going to reread your letters & answer any questions I might find in them but find that if I read I can’t write so I will only write. While I was still reading your letters this afternoon, I had to go down to Kanouse’s to see one of my sick men. He is poor fellow very ill I do not think that he will ever recover he may get over this sharp attack, but is liable at any moment to suddenly drop dead. Poor fellow – he is his grandmother’s only grandchild & had lived with her all his life – never having been away from her until he came on this expedition. He must have been longing to see the wrinkled old face & to hear the tremulous accents of his old second mother – to hear from her or of her – and here I was in the bloom of health blessed with news from my loved ones, while he poor chap lay suffering in mind & body without one scrap of comfort. It seems so hard. I talked with him a long time and it was quite dark when I got back & found tea waiting and your letters still unfinished & Jack’s & Mannie’s & the Home letter & Ned’s all to be read. I first went to the Colonel & told him I wanted some one to go down & sit up with the sick man – went & got the likeliest man for that purpose and made up some medicine for him – gave directions how it was to be taken – came in had tea – lit my pipe and then finished your letters & Jack’s & the Home one. I think you must be mistaken when you say that mother has suffered so much with her ear and eye. Aunt Ellie says it is Aunt Lou & if it were Mother what would she be doing way up in Philadelphia. I must close now with fervent heartful thanks to the glorious giver of all good things & with my best love to my own Lizzie.

Barrie

Fort Benton September 24th 1874

Dearest Lizzie

It is now a long time since I wrote to you. I am glad to say that I still continue as well as ever and are getting stronger & fatter every day. I never was better in any life. I am brown as an Indian. My nose I firmly believe to be made after the fashion of an onion, the successive layers of skin that have peeled off would make a bushel of onions. We have pushed on from the Cypress Hills, sometimes with water sometimes not – grass was every where scarce – the weather is as fine as weather could be. On the last of September I purchased a horse, large, well formed, black, and have given him the high sounding title of “Satan” at one time he was the finest horse in the force – his only vice that he shied. Poor fellow what with no oats no grass no water – I am afraid he is a gone horse. He carried me very well to the Sweet Grass Hills – and is now quietly grazing. He is gentle knows his name & will follow me like a dog. Our choice of guides was most unfortunate not one of them knew the country through which we passed, our course was run by the compass & Palliser’s map – whichs not correct – we struck the South Saskatchewan a day sooner than we expected, the guide told us it was the Forks – the Bow & Belly Rivers – we knew better – four or five days after this we did strike the Bow River – in fact went beyond it & it was by accident that we discovered it – it is a lonely desert place one island with a few trees on it – high banks and not a soul near it – no grass – no road – we travelled 15 or 20 miles up the Belly River and sent a party up the Bow River for 80 miles – they found a party a Indians on the war path – put no fort[,] no road[,] no whiskey smugglers[.] we then retraced our steps and went south & struck the Boundary line at the Sweet Grass Hills or 3 Buttes. Here we were to pass the winter – two troops went on to Garry & two to remain and build huts for the winter & Col. French, Major McLeod & myself came down with a few carts to Fort Benton to get supplies. Our plans have slightly changed since we came here. We will now probably winter somewhere on the Belly River. Your letters if directed to me at Fort Benton will reach me – we will have a mail about once a month, perhaps not quite so often. I believe there is a settlement of Half Breeds near where we will be stationed & I can get them to make moccasins etc. for me. The Col. found a letter here for him directing him to make his headquarters at Fort Pelly – we will be much better off than they. One day while travelling towards the Buttes, I went off the line of march to hunt. I got quite lost – did not know where the trail was could see nothing but the bleak dreary wilderness – my companion a little dog had left me. I climbed a hill & looked out then another then another could see nothing the Buttes I could see - & had determined to make for them a matter of about ten miles. I came to this determination and though I would like some dinner so I shot at an antelope and missed him and hunting after him I saw what I thought was a heard of buffalo near a lake. I made for that and found the train stopping for dinner – they were just moving off. I got no dinner but was only too thankful to get in to mind that. I felt so lonely out on the prairie that I felt justified in opening your letter and my darling I can only thank most fervently the good God who put the thought of writing it in your head. You have no idea [(]can have none[)] of the immense comfort it was to me. You know I carry your little testament with me always. I seldom have time in the mornings to read it and at night we have no candles so on the march I get ahead of the troops sit down & read until they come up. I have looked at your dear handwriting again and again, but have never opened the envelope until then on the prairie lost and alone. Tell Mannie Cameron if he writes to direct to Fort Benton. I want you to ask him a question or two for me. No.1 Where is the supply of Sulphate of Alum obtained for the United States and Canada to what uses is it applied & is it expensive?

I must close before I have finished half of what I wish to say but the mail closes at 9 o’clock and it now wants but a few moments of that. We saw on our way down here swarms of Buffalo more than 50000 in one herd the plains for miles as far as we could see were black with them – we passed right thro’ their midst.

Capt. Miles wished me to say that he would like his wife to know he is well and on his road back to Fort Garry (as he thinks) – give my love to your Father Mother and all – Remember me to the Slotesburgs & give my kind regards to the Camerons.

Goodbye my darling Lizzie.
Yours forever
Barrie.